Vetsnov

17/11/2007:

Quintin XV 37 - 7 Quintin Vets XVIII

The 1st’s had a number of issues that they would need to deal with if they were to defeat the Vets and avenge last year’s ignominious defeat. Firstly, they would have to match the Vets scrum - easier said than done when you consider the voluptuousness of some of the Vets forwards. Second, they would have to compete well at the breakdown, something we didn’t do last year meaning that we got slow ball, and thirdly, we would have to stop their powerful ball carriers, Albi and Finlay, from getting over the gain line.

Before the game started it was good to see our Great Leader, El Presidente Gordon, after having recently been in hospital. There were lots of attendees, ex captain Fat Wharfe being one of the more recent players to come and watch.

The above targets were a big ask, but the 1st’s got off to a flying start, with the Vet’s fumbling the kick off and Freddie catching and securing for the 1st XV. The ball was quickly recycled and the ball spun to the backs enabling OsboUrne to score under the posts. Sanger was unable to convert the try (the fact that he was using Vinesy’s beret as a kicking tee might have had something to do with it), but it was clear that the 1st’s meant business.

Soon afterwards, the backs were at it again, with OsboUrne giving Phil the ball in space allowing him to cross over the line. With my strained labial joint I was a spectator for the game and it was great to hear a lot of the old boys on the touchline saying how impressed they were with the performance of the backs.

The forwards were also doing well - we had two front rows (unheard of for Quintin), and for most scrums were able to hold our own. There was one time when we were on the back foot, but the advance was slowed when Gentleman Racer BJ Stilton Esq was seen hanging onto the back of the Vets scrum - his gammy joints unable to keep up with the pace. After the poor lineout against GWR, it was good to see the link between the thrower and the jumper working more effectively, and I for one was impressed at seeing how quickly the ball could get from the jumper to the backs. Quintin proved they were more than able of mixing it up in the forwards, with Ginger wonder SchokoladenProppen diving over from short range for his 1st try of the season.
At half time, the frustration was beginning to show amongst the Vets. Vines was claiming that Dyke scrummaged like a lady/Damo - it seemed that our plan to offer Vines “refreshments” at every opportunity was paying off.

In the second half the Vets started to give far sterner competition. Albi and Finley were making their trademark runs, but every time they went a few metres, they were stopped in their tracks. At the time I wasn’t sure of the reason for this (probably due to acute Limoncello poisoning, or it could be the fact that Deviant Dan kept trying to drop his trousers and show his thigh), but ex Captain Fat Pickin informed me that “Choker Mullet Allergy to Training” Jason was having a stormer - tacking anything that moved - all those years chasing sheep round the farm paying dividends. Fellow sheep worrier Rob was also having a great time from the base of the scrum - his trademark runs signalled by a rendition of Calon Lan as he terrorised the opposing fly half.

Damo was enjoying himself having been demoted from tight head to scrum half for the day after his squealing against GWR. At some point in the second half he was able to waddle from the half way line for a fantastic solo try. Not content with this he scored another.

Man of the Match: OsboUrne - a fantastic return from injury/hair transplant

Honourable mention: Rob: great running

Sheep worrier: Superb tacking

Girl of the Match: Damo - For behaving like a back

Tip to Vets for next year:
The game is fifteen a side, not eighteen. And of those fifteen, seven are supposed to be backs.